i was wondering to myself earlier today.. i wonder how much longer i can forget about everything and run away from it all before it comes back to slap me in the face.
How many more times can i ‘re-invent’ myself before i have to accept myself?
How much longer can i ‘avoid playing the victim’ until i realise that i’m not okay?
How many bad relationships do i have to enter before i learn from my past and confront any childhood issues?
How much longer will i keep punishing myself before i treat myself better than i treat those who have no respect for me?
when will i value myself as a person?
when will i like me?
when will i not let the opinions of other validate myself?
When will i stop waiting for tomorrow to implement these things?
it’s easy to run, it’s harder to face yourself. i don’t want to end up bitter and fucked up because of the actions of others. i don’t want to become a monster and punish others for things that weren’t their fault. i don’t want to spend the rest of my life scared by the past.
somehow i need to find courage to be brave enough to take practical action and stop reliving my past.