Last weekend i made a man run down the road from me, because he was so terrified of confrontation.
it’s funny, as soon as you stand up for yourself and demand to be treated with respect, these horrible people suddenly drop from you like flies.
I’ve never seen someone run down the road at such speed.
I am also pretty surprised that i had it in my self to confront someone directly about the way they had treated me and to stand my ground and keep my boundaries.
although it was strange. i felt a little guilty after doing so, maybe that’s because i’m not used to actually valuing myself and having other people value me? i don’t know.
i find it very hard to give men a chance know. i think everything they say to me is bullshit. maybe it’s a defence mechanism. maybe i’m just pissed off.
the day before that i spent the whole night getting free drinks off men , who thought that by buying me alcohol they could get me home. i had no remorse in giving them a run for their money. i think they’re all pathetic cunts. maybe i’m becoming a man hater. i think i have reason to be one. but then at the same time in the back of my head i know that not all men are the same. maybe i just need to go through this period of sifting through the dirt in order to learn and for my life to become better?
maybe i need to sit, absorb, think, reflect, enjoy the moment, be terrified, be brave. i don’t know really. maybe i just need to accept that for this moment in time i don’t have the answers to everything and that it’s okay not to.